Entries of life ★

oh well...seriously i am tired...if you say dun treat you as a 出气筒 then dun treat me one too. you saying it like this so can i. you wan to play some kind of games with me, i shall play with you. for your info i dun like playing those kind of 心理战。i dislike it cos i understand that the pain it brings will be bigger than what you expect. i dun like to play. when i choose to keep quiet you say i am angry. BLOODY FOR YOUR INFO I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO TALK. i hate being misunderstood. i hate being some clown. I HAD BEEN SOME KIND OF CLOWN TRYING TO MAKE YOU HAPPY WHEN YOU ARE DOWN AND EACH TIME YOU TAKE MY ACTIONS AS GRANTED TO I GIVE UP.

i have nothing to say. all i want to say mabel's birthday i have found a way to give her on her day. DUN HAVE TO TROUBLE YOU. SORRY IF THAT WAS HARSH BUT AT LEAST THAT WAS WHAT I WANT TO SAY.

come on what you wanna scold just smash it on my face SAY IT TO ME ON MY DAMN FUCKED OFF FACE. i hate this. it gets worse. one day i can just cry in class just because i cannot take ALL THESE DAMN THINGS which brings me LOTS OF STRESS.

if you seriously want to noe why i was so sad that day, i tell you part of it was my senior most of it, it was you guys. you guys didn't tok to me that morning, so i didn't tok. and you guys think that i am angry. FOR GOD'S SAKE, nothing to talk so what your expect me to say? so your were expecting to talk to your with that enthu attitude everyday? dude you can do it? sorry ah i have MOOD SWINGS too. FUCK....i am saying it all out. BLEAH i am only trying to be honest with you.

ARH~~HOW TIRING IT CAN BE. LET IT GO AND BE FREE....MAYBE ONE DAY I SHALL FREE. LET THAT THING FLY PASS ME AND THERE I GO WITH THE WIND.

whatever it is, all you want from me...it was just a sorry. if i said sorry, you will still have that scar in you right? we can't go back what it is before after i posted this. BECAUSE I GONE THROUGH ONCE. FRIENDSHIP IS TOO HARD FOR ME. I WAS HURT ONCE, I DUN WISH FOR A SECOND TIME. AND HERE GOES THE SECOND TIME. MAYBE IT WAS MY FAULT. I AM SORRY THEN. but i can tell you....my tears were all gone when the first time hit me harshly. this second time...just................COST ME ANOTHER PAINFUL MEMORIES.

let me go....maybe i should just go with the god. then just use my soul to look over my dearest ones....whatever it is....i just one to be a star to be able to look at my loved one on the high and big and beautiful sky.

shall i just say GOODBYE TO ALL OF YOU?

nope....cos i just want to....stay alive just till i get to see junsu for one last time and the first time.

any way it is kinda 矛盾....cos i dun what i am toking now...i going through mixed emotions. sad guilty worry depressed angry happy. all at one time. so if it upsets or anger you. sorry. but now you noe i am fragile too....i am just a girl too...